Those people who constantly reblog your stuff but you never really talk:
I do notice my regulars. You guys are the best.
"Regulars" makes me feel like a bar-tender…
Wiping down my dash at the end of an evening, I see your read-more, over-hear your rant in the tags, so I pour you a drink.
"…what’s troubling you, kid?"
rebloging again because my regulars are fabulous
Can you imagine the conversation though?
Queen: I’m going
Chief of Staff: But, Your Majesty, the security risks…
Queen: I’m going I want cake
Chief of Staff:
Chief of Staff:
Queen: I want cake
There’s this asshole who every time he sees me with my ukulele he thinks he’s funny and asks “Can you play any Metallica?” but the joke is now on him because I just learned how to play the intro riff to Master of Puppets.
I did it. I fucking did it. He asked me again just like I knew he would and I stared him straight in the eyes without blinking and just fucking shredded on my ukulele
THIS IS BRILLIANT ON SO MANY LEVELS
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
Excuse me, I think you’re forgetting a few people
And last but not least…
OH. MY. GOD.
IT GOT BETTER
It got so much better
GUYS CAN WE TAKE A MOMENT TO APPRECIATE THESE BEAUTIFUL GLASS PENS
THEY’RE LIKE WANDS
What would Jesus not do?
Things Jesus would do:
- Flip tables
- Turn water into fine wine to save your wedding party
- Tell the weather outside to STOP
- Curse trees for producing shitty fruit
- Bring people back from the dead
- Go fishing
- Give you food
- Whatever the hell he wants to on the Sabbath
- Make furniture
- Walk across the ocean because you need to stop
This…is the best
As Stalkingstalkerthatstalks said: Canon Jesus is better than fanon Jesus.
Canon Jesus is better than fanon Jesus.
CAN I GET THAT ON A TSHIRT
Fanon Jesus is a white guy who hugs lambs
Canon Jesus is a sassy middle eastern guy who hung out with prostitudes and spread peace and acceptance of everyone
who also hugged lambs
1903 Léon-François Comerre - Byclette Vesinet